I can't believe he said ...
"I’ll never forget what my N said to me one day. My mother was suffering from colon cancer, which later spread to her liver. The day we received that news, I shared this with my N thinking maybe I would get some sympathy that my mother was getting worse. His response was “Well, so, your mother dies, we break up, but you’ll always have your girlfriends, but then if they dump you too, you’ll at least always have your TV set.”
"Those women's shoes in my closet are MINE". Then I ask if he's dressing in drag..."Oh I have NO idea where they came from". Quick change.
Pefume by his bed where there was none before, and not mine: "I use it for aromatherapy". Well, I finally met her and we both ditched him."
"Upon Sharing Intimacies etc. he said: "Believe me Kim, with me, Less is More"
"I liked fun having sex with other women while I was with you...but now that you are gone it's not fun anymore."
”Just tell me if you going bankrupt, I will have to trade you in then."
THE NON-COMMITTALS
Words they say to squirm out of answering...
"We'll see"
"We'll see what happens."
"I'll see what I'm doing and if I can get free, I'll call you"
"Do you have to know right this minute?"
"We'll cross that bridge when we get there."
"I thought I was ready, but I guess I'm not as much as you would like me to be."
"When I've decided I"ll let you know."
"I can't make you promises because when I break them, you'll get hurt."
He said, verbatim: "It's really for the best (that he was leaving me) because I don't know how much longer I could've held out, and I probably would ended up raping your mother."
"He told me, "It is like when you put an animal in
cage, I like to poke at you, because I like to watch you get mad".
While making love, my widowed husband said to me "Oh this is how my X liked it."
"That's what you do with hot girls, break 'em down until they don't think they're pretty anymore - just like I did with you."
"I'm an asshole, live with it!"
“When I was married to you I had 10 to 20 black skanks as lovers and another 100 skanks on top of them and I would have preferred any of them to you as the mother of my children.”
"She wouldn't stop crying, so I had to have sex with her."
On talking about buying a new German Magnum rifle:
"I don't want to shoot with it, I just want it to bring attention to myself."
"DO I MEAN WHAT I SAY OR AM I JUST THE BEST BULLSHITTER OR WHAT?"
When his father died, " Hey if my mom dies, we will probably get the house."
"I expect to be THE beneficiary of your will, your kids can have something."
"I can have everything I want."
"How come when you write emails to your friends and family you never write to them anything about me and how good of a husband I am to you? You don't say anything worthwhile about ME". He emphasized ME. He sat me down and made me write especially my family, Mom and Dad about how great he was and how wonderful of a husband he was and how he was taking care of us."
He used to scream at me "Why do you have to have your own opinions?"
"I will continue to critisize you if you don't cook better meals, The only way to get you to listen to me is to yell and swear, so what else can I do?"
When I asked him to pick me up at the subway at night because there were gang members at the exit: "You interrupted my movie downloading for this?"
"I'm going to build you up and build you up, just to knock you down."
of course later, he adamantly denied saying it,
"I hate being your mother's babysitter."
"I do love you but I'm looking for a women who makes enough money to support my life style."
After returning from the funeral of his mother, who died a horribly painful premature death, he commented,
"I was surprised more people didn't hug me and tell me how sorry they were. Only one cousin hugged me."
"You're like a tool in my tool belt, I take you out when I need you and leave you in the tool box when I don't."
And my all time favorite........"She's the best work I've done yet!"
"I asked why he was being so verbally abusive. His response was 'BECAUSE I CAN" Didnt that say it all?"
Member NH wasn't seeing his child for child custody visitations. His explanation: "It's too painful for me to see him".....with a sob in his voice.
N: "One thing I'll never forgive you for, is you taking me away from that
little boy of mine"
Me: "Then why don't you see him more?" (He had cut his visits from every
weekend, Friday and Saturday nights, to every other Saturday night.)
N: (with a sob in his voice) "Because it hurts too much to see him."
Member 2: My stepson wasn't taking his kids either. His 'justification' - "I don't see the boys as often anymore because It hurts me too much when I have to drop them off." I guess that translates into if he loved them more he wouldn't see them at all.
"The BEST time to kick a man is WHEN he's down!"
"Keeping up appearance works for me."
"I'd like to find a rich old bag with a bad cough."
"I seek your approval of my actions and constantly fear your rejection."
"My relationship with you is over, I have moved on, got places to go, people to meet and victims to find."
* * * * *
"I made you everything your are today."
"I’d like to beat the shit out of you!"
N (looking into mirror) "Don't I look cute?" 
"I just have this sudden urge to punch you right in the face."
"I cant be with a smart woman anymore. I need to find a women who is stupid and easy going"
"You aren't allowed to get mad."
"I'm an addiction. You'll never get me out of your head. I'm here to stay, Baby."
"I want dinner NOW."
"You should worship me because I am a man."
"I am God"
"You don't need to go to the company picnic, it's just for people I know."
"Chicks dig me."
"I can't help it if all women find me adorable."
"Any woman who goes bowling at night with the girls is out to get some."
"I don't lie; I just stretch the truth."
"I can't share my feelings with you, basically because I don't HAVE any."
"Get them while they're sick."
“It’s your fault I yell at you.”
"I have a hard time telling the truth."
"If you can't screw over your friends then who can you screw over?"
"If I can't be CEO, then I'm not interested in the job."
“My management style? Fear!"
"Well, what's in that for me?"
"I can smell fear at a hundred yards."
“People are interchangeable."
“When it's no more fun I just get rid of you."
Geez even on our first date he said: "I cleaned my car, you'd better be worth it."
“If people are stupid enough to let me ..I'm gonna take advantage?”
"It's none of your business what I do."
“What's wrong with going to bars without you?”
“That’s not what I meant! You misunderstood.”
"You'll never find anyone better than me."
When asked for some money he owed me said "I thought my contributions were sufficient!!"
"Well, if I hadn't told her I'd pay her back, she wouldn't have given me the money, would she?"
At Valentine’s dinner he says, "You know I'm not obligated to do this for you."
"Emotions are an evolutionary dead end. I believe I have transcended them. I never feel angry or anything - just pure intellect."
“I don't want to get married because they'll get your pension."
"I can't stay here 'cause you are not under control."
I asked the N I knew what he would do if he found himself in a bad situation. He told me he'd 'play crazy, play dumb, send out so much shit* on the river that he could walk across to the other side'. His very words.
My husband told me he would "destroy me" and said so on repeated occasions.
"Your grandmother will be fine." (she was 92 and in a coma with a 5% chance or less of living). "There's no reason to go see her. Anyway, she couldn't hear you, so what's the point?"
When I heard him say "Are you awake?", I said "Yes!" and he said "No you weren't", and he said "I did a test to see if you were asleep (and he started drawing on my chest) and said "I was saying, This is where I'm going to cut your heart out, this is where I'm going to cut your spleen out, and this is where I'm going to cut your kidney out." I jumped up and called him a f.....weirdo and he started laughing saying "I was only joking."
“Hooray for me! F’ you!”
“That’s the goal! - Keep you on your toes, or keep you on your back.”
“You can’t stop this from moving forward just because you don’t want it to.”
“A girl wearing a skirt on a date is clearly asking for it.”
“What’s mine is mine and what’s yours is mine.”
Mind told me he loved me, then the next week he told me that he was obsessed with someone else. When I reminded him that he'd told me he loved me, he remarked "that was different!"
We go to the grocery store. We buy something. We stand at the check out stand together, watching the lady bag the groceries. I pay, as always. We are only "dating", so I pay for everything, because he thinks it is wrong for women to expect him to "take them out". He eats for free, at my house, three days per week. We carry the food out to my car, together. We get home, ready for the Expert N Chef to prepare a meal, with me in the role of scullery maid. Something we bought is missing. "How could you forget that, it was so important?", he asks me impatiently, and goes on. "I don't forget things when I go to the store, I watch to see that they put everything in the bag!" "But you were there, too, and had equal responsibility," I protest. He says, "How can you say that, when you were the one paying for them?"
"He tells me long stories about his life, on a regular basis. Sometimes they are half hour monologues or more. One time I listen to one of his stories and it reminds me of something that happened to me that I decide to tell him about. I say less than one sentence before he says, "Did you feed the dogs?" "Yes," I say, and remain silent. "Go on, go on," he says impatiently, without looking at me, rotating his hand in the air. I say another sentence, and he interrupts, "Will you hand me that newspaper?" I hand it to him. He begins to read it. "Did you not have the slightest interest in what I was saying?" I ask him, after a while. "I might," he says, "if you didn't go on and on, endlessly. Conversation should be a dialogue."
"I buy everything we eat when he is at my house, three days a week. We need some milk, which we both take in our coffee, and he says, "I want a walk, I'll go out for it." "Do you want some money," I say, heading for my purse. He laughs derisively, looking right at me, hands in his pockets as I try to hand him some money. "Why are you laughing," I ask. "It is so ridiculous," he says. "Here I am going out to buy you some milk, and you ask me if I want money. 'Would I like some money?' What do you think I want, to pay for your milk as well as going to get it?"
When youngest child was 15, he and Dad had a falling out. Youngest child told him how angry he was at him for things he had done. Dad's response? “If you aren’t going to agree with me and tell me I am right, then I don’t want you to come to see me any more!” Hasn't seen or spoken to youngest son for 3 years now.
"When I arrive home, you are supposed to be waiting at the door for me with something cold to drink and a cloth wipe my brow."
"He is restless. He takes a walk. He comes back still restless. "Take another walk with me," he says. "I still want to be outside." I dress for the winter weather and head out with him. I comment on a passing dog. He is silent. I say "hi" to a neighbor as we walk by. He is silent. There's a flag of a foreign country I don't recognize on the house of another neighbor, and I wonder aloud what country it represents. He is silent, and walks rapidly ahead of me so that I am following six feet behind. We pass by my house again, and I turn in the walkway. "Why are you going in?" he turns around and asks. "Because it is clear you don't want to walk with me." "I would," he says, "if only you would just be quiet."
"We met on the internet. When I read his profile I remember thinking "boy is this guy a cocky bastard". He was saying how handsome he was and that he would be a good catch basically. Well, he contacted me first - I almost didn't respond after reading his profile but I did. We talked for about a week on the phone and then met. One of his first comments to me when he met me was "you've got potential". should have gotten up then and ran."
I said "What if I break down in the car?"
He said "So pull over and flag someone down."
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